Boosting Your Success with Six Easy Happiness Tips

by: Christina Winsey-Rudd

In what areas of your life would you like to achieve greater success? State-of-mind (attitude towards life and work) absolutely affects your performance and your outcomes. People who stay in jobs they hate, or relationships and situations in which they are chronically unhappy are not only missing out on the joy life has to offer, but are literally putting their health at risk at the same time.

When coaching clients I ask them to do a rough pre-assessment: on a scale of one to ten, ten being that you are consistently happy with your day-to-day life 90-95% of the time, where do you rank? If the answer is five or six, here are some tips and techniques to boost it up.

Live by your definition of happiness and success? Many people feel an ongoing sense of dissatisfaction with their lives or businesses because they are using someone else’s “happiness measuring stick”. Comparing your life and achievements to those of others, and using their criteria rather than yours is a sure fire way to lose the happiness game.

Take “happiness breaks” using a “fun and joy list”. Many people don’t realize how much more productive they can be by feeding their souls and hearts throughout the workday. Lunch hour not withstanding, 10-15 minute “happiness breaks” are real attitude and brain-boosters. A checklist prevents you from saying “I wouldn’t even know what to do with myself if I took a break from work.”

Become a Pollyanna! Pollyanna, contrary to popular opinion, wasn’t teaching denial, or pie in the sky positive thinking. Rather she perfected a mind-set of learned optimism and of seeing the glass “half full”. Pollyanna’s “Glad Game” turned around an entire town from being gloomy and pessimistic to being a happy, joyful place.

Not only will your sunny outlook help you be happier more of the time, but also your “vibes” will positively affect those around you. If you’re single, keeping a sunny disposition will make your “vibe” much more attractive. People like to be around upbeat people who make them feel good).

If you’re in sales, or are looking to climb a success ladder, you will be much more attractive to your ideal employer or ideal customer if your attitude is obviously an optimistic and happy one.

Have Better Relationships by Living From Both Head and Heart. Being too rigid, and intellectual can really wreck the relationship “happiness quotient”. The people in your life, just like you, want to hear expressed appreciation and to be given more understanding.

Sadly, it seems much easier in our society, for people to express disappointment, criticism and negative observations than it does the positive ones. Speak words of encouragement and appreciation freely.

Ask for acknowledgement when you need it too. People can’t (HEAR THIS – THEY ABSOLUTELY CAN’T) read your mind. When you give and take freely of appreciation, understanding, praise, joy and fun in relationships they are bound to flourish.

On the business side of things, you will be seen as a premier team player when you contribute to your business relationships in this way.

Stay in the here and now. When coaching clients, one of the most frequent things I hear is “When I achieve this goal I will finally be happy.” Life isn’t happening “then”. Life is happening right NOW!

Make a habit of slowing things down. Savor those good people, experiences and feelings in the very moment you are experiencing them. While you are experiencing them and noticing them, inwardly say a thought of gratitude that you have this person, job, experience, feeling, or talent.

Whatever it is that you are enjoying, it will stay with you longer throughout the day if you don’t let it fly by without acknowledgement. At the end of the day, as you review it, if you’ve really practiced this “here and now happiness”, the overall feeling about your day will be a good one.

When negatives come along the fact that you have spent time practicing this “here and now happiness” will make it a great deal easier to wade through it without overreacting.

Quiet your negative self-talk. Many people are completely unaware of the numerous negative things they may say to themselves throughout the day. The fact is that, like criticism of others, negative self-talk never ever helped anyone perform better.

Become your own detective. Carry a little notebook around with you and whenever you are aware of some negative thoughts running through your mind write them down. Then consciously and deliberately refute the negative thought with some positive observations.

What if you were to stop those thoughts as if you were a policeman with a whistle and immediately bring on the flow of positive self-compliments? Pick any and all good characteristics about both your looks and about you as a person begin to acknowledge yourself for them emphatically.

Here again, when you love and appreciate yourself for what’s good, your “vibes” will be good ones and people will like being around you. In fact, they will begin to think and feel about you, the way you do. When you value yourself the world will too!

These are just a few ways you can enhance the quality of your happiness experience and your life. Get creative and begin thinking of your own solutions! They will pay big dividends.

"Go for the moon. If you don't get it, you'll still be heading for a star."

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Three Inspirations for Happiness

by: David Leonhardt


The following three inspirations were adapted from A Daily Dose of Happiness, and they represent three key ways to increase our happiness.

1. FORGIVING FOR HAPPINESS

We like to think we are better than our friends below us in the food chain, such as the octopus and the snail. After all, we have love. We feel happiness. We have empathy. We have a conscience. We can reason.

We can also hold onto grudges.

Grudges are, in fact, prickly little creatures that worm their way into our hearts. Holding onto them is a self-defeating exercise.

Fortunately, forgiveness is also uniquely human. Forgiveness cleanses the spirit. Forgiveness let's us get on with enjoying our lives instead of being preoccupied with someone else's. Forgiveness opens the door to happiness.

2. SUPPORTING FOR HAPPINESS

When things seem to be very bleak, it does not take much to lift someone's spirits. Sometimes all it takes is to let somebody know they are not alone.

That is why it is so important to smile at people, especially if they look down. And if you know what is weighing the person down, let them know they are not alone. Don't go burdening them with all your miseries, but let them know you have been there.

Guess what? You will feel happiness for having helped them, too.

3. ACCEPTING FOR HAPPINESS

There is no such thing as happiness if you are not at peace with yourself. Too many people just don't know how to make peace with themselves.

Peace begins with acceptance. Whether we agree with everything we do (like the environmentalist who sometimes throws out a recyclable container), it is important to accept what we do.

Do we always make the best choices? No. But they are the choices we make.

Do we always treat people with the most respect? No. But it is how we treat people.

Can we improve? Yes, and we should. But that is a project for the future. First we must accept who we are now, rather than condemning ourselves. Then we can move to improve the person we will be tomorrow. Both acceptance today and improvements tomorrow will increase our happiness.

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Where is Happiness?

by: Lance E. Ong

Do you move through life feeling everyday is the same? Like some repeated pattern that goes on and on? For some people, there's nothing new to do under the sun, and nowhere to go. Everything is just boring, boring, boring. They work so hard to earn enough money to play, but yet their playtime passes so fast. Suffer five days, enjoy two days. Sometimes, to break the monotony, they seek thrill through intoxicants (alcohol, smoke), sex, and even drugs. For these temporary pleasures, it feels exciting while it's happening, but once it's over, the same pattern of meaninglessness sets in, and they're left thinking, "When can I get the next high?"

Perhaps you will recognize this scene... Two old men are sitting on a bus. As the bus passes by the red-light district, one old man says to the other, "Hey... aren't you going to see the chickens (prostitute) today?" The other man raises an eyebrow... a spark in his wrinkled eyes, "Yes, yes, I will be going this afternoon!" The first old man smirks, and says, "You didn't even bring your medicine, how can you DO IT?"

For some people, their lust is so strong, that they borrow money from family and friends, just to visit brothels. You will see this pattern in addicts. Drug addicts, sex addicts, alcohol addicts. They're always looking for the greater thrill and the next high, and that's what sets their life on a downward spiral. They waste their time, energy, and money, instead of using it to build success.

For life to have zest, everyone needs that natural feeling of drive, anticipation, and excitement. When one does not know how to get it naturally, one may resort to vices to stimulate that sense of being fully alive, desperately trying to bring some meaning into life. But you see, happiness is within you... If you can’t satisfy your wants, then the other way to happiness is to release them. Let go of that which you must have. Shakyamuni Buddha said that, "All desire leads to suffering..." Suffering because you crave what you do not have. And let me ask you this: Is this yearning self-created? Or something imposed on you by the outside world? Perhaps it's the outside world's fault because other people keep flaunting their luxuries and exotic experiences. But surely, we create this yearning within ourselves. It is within our power to control it, or release it altogether.

Lord Richard Layard, Professor from the London School of Economics, a leading happiness researcher, says, "Happiness is a balance between your expectations and your attainments. One way is to get what you want. The other, is liking what you get."

Many of our desires are misplaced. We think getting them will bring us happiness, but that is an illusion. These misplaced desires are nothing more than temporary pleasures. You don't need to satisfy your desires to be happy; you need only release them. Do you need the attention of the opposite sex? No, as you get older, your body parts will sag, and the opposite sex will pay less attention to you. Must you get laid to be happy? No, as you age, your sex hormones will lessen, and so will your desire to mate. Must you wait till you have a million bucks? Nope. Historical and worldwide research shows that above US$15,000 a year, higher income is no guarantee of greater happiness.

The people who feel good everyday, without resorting to vices, have one mental characteristic in common. They have a dream, and they know what they want to achieve in life. This sense of purpose drives them; gives meaning to their existence. They have discovered their soul's calling, and are living life to the fullest by following it. This is different from those who are 'party animals', "living life to the fullest" by drowning in deafening music, and shaking till the sun rises... That's not living, that's dying.

If you want to find true meaning and happiness in life, then you've got to uncover your life's purpose. For each of us has a unique destiny. A path made specially for you to walk on this journey through life. Follow it, and you arrive in paradise. Ignore it, and you continue to wander... wasting time, and life itself.

1. You need to know what you’re made of. Your talents, strengths, and abilities.

2. Craft a vision for yourself, and visualize that dream in your mind.

3. Work out a plan that sets your goals and decides what actions you must take to achieve them.

4. Tell your closest friends about it, and commit yourself to taking five of the planned actions everyday to build your dream.

When you see that your actions are creating results, it will be a natural source of excitement and inspiration. Instead of spending time, energy, and money on vices, you invest it in creating an upward spiral of success. By releasing your desire for temporary pleasures, you kick your bad habit out the door. By choosing to live your purpose and answer your soul’s calling, you break free from the chains of monotony, and find truth, meaning, and happiness in life.

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3 Misconceptions About Happiness

by: Deanna Mascle

The sad truth is that there are a lot of unhappy people in the world. The tragic truth is that many of those unhappy people could lead happier lives if only they gave up the misconceptions they have about happiness. Even those of us who consider themselves relatively happy still cling to some of these untruths. Why? Probably because it is easier to blame someone else for our unhappiness when the simple fact is that no one else has power over our happiness. We give that power to others but that is our choice. Once we take control of our own happiness then we will be happier, but in order to take back that control over our happiness we need to rid ourselves of three popular misconceptions about it.

One of the greatest misconceptions related to happiness is that you need money to be happy. If you take some time out to study people around you then you will see just how little substance there is to this belief. Rich people are not automatically happy and poor people are not automatically unhappy. In fact, once you begin looking at individuals and families then you will no doubt spot a great many unhappy rich people and even more happy poor people.

The truth is that once your basic needs are taken care then money will not have a major impact on your happiness. In fact, making it dependent on the attainment of a certain amount of money is often a recipe for a very unhappy life. Pursuing money is a bad goal because so often people get caught up in a rat race they can never win. For people who consider money the ultimate measure of success there is never enough money so they will never be happy.

In fact, one reason many poor people are happy is that they realize that once their family is fed, clothed and housed then money isn't that important when you compare it to love, friendship, and laughter. Those things are important and can't be bought at any price.

Another big misconception about happiness is that you need someone else to be happy. Happiness comes from within yourself. You are the only one who controls your happiness. You do not need friends or significant others for it. You do not need children or grandchildren for it. You can be happy without the acclaim of others and without being famous. While having other people to care about is an important element of human contentment and therefore happiness, it can be a great mistake to place to great of an emphasis on the need for one specific relationship. If you have a loving family and friends then that is what is important not the fact that you lack a spouse. Having love in your life is what counts not the source of that love.

The third big misconception about happiness is that you need to be lucky to be happy. Happiness is not about luck but rather about opening yourself up to it, looking for it in unlikely places, and allowing yourself to be happy. Many of the people who subscribe to the luck theory of happiness are the same people who believe that they do not deserve to be happy. Everyone deserves to be happy and everyone has the capacity to be a happy person. Don't wait for happiness to come to you but rather open your life to it and you will find it.

You can be happy and you can lead a happier life if you just let go of these three misconceptions. You don't need money, other people, or luck to be happy. You have the power over your own happiness if you only open your heart and your life. So be happy!

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A Formula For Happiness?

by: Deanna Mascle

Did you know that psychologists have now come up with a formula for happiness?

They call themselves "positive psychologists" and led by Professor Martin Seligman of the University of Pennsylvania, who has been described as the father of positive psychology, they have a formula for happiness.

It is simply: Pleasure + engagement + meaning = happiness.

I do not have a degree in psychology but I am a student of human kind and it seems to me that while it seems simplistic (and these "positive psychologists" will be the first to admit it is overly simplistic) it actually touches on the central issues that I have expressed to my readers over the years.

In order to be happy we need pleasure in our lives. We need the small pleasures of a tasty treat, a beautiful sunrise, or laughter. We also need larger pleasures found in success and love.

We also need engagement to be happy. This means that our lives must include activities or enterprises that capture our wholehearted interest. You know, the level of engagement when we forget about the clock, the outside world, and just about everything but the object of our focus.

Finally, we must have meaning in our life. We must feel that we matter and that what we do matters. We must know that we are valuable, valued and that our lives make a difference.

One of the faults with this simple formula is that it does not include an urge to balance. It would be too easy to focus on one area to the detriment of others. While engagement and meaning are essential to the formula, for example, overlooking the need for pleasure could make happiness impossible to attain.

While some may mock this "happiness formula", I would argue that it can be useful in the pursuit of becoming a happier person. We all need reminders that being happy is not serendipity but rather an active choice. In fact, more than a choice, being happy really is an action that must be taken every day.

Are you happy most of the time? Then share your own secret formula! But if you are not happy then it can be well worth your time to consider the "happiness formula" and how you can apply it to your life. Remember, it is not enough to wish for or think about happiness -- but rather you must live it.

You can live a happier life with the help of the happiness formula as well as your own active pursuit of happiness.

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